February 13, 2023
3:02 am : at my desk, tired
Yahweh. I can’t go back to the way things used to be. Forgive me. Cleanse me. Help me to sleep once more. I truly don’t want to be in the same place I was last year. Yahweh, I need you. I need your deliverance in every way.
Yahweh, you said to stand still and you would deliver. That victory belongs to you. But I am still here, standing, waiting on your deliverance. I don’t know if there is anything else for me to do, but stand on your word. Ready, willing. I need your deliverance. I am tired and I can’t go back. I can’t go back. And I’m stuck. You are the Waymaker. Yahweh, make a way please. Because I am not seeing it. Open my eyes, open my heart to know what to do. Because I can’t go back and I can’t stay stuck here. In every instance you said to “Stand Still”, you delivered. Yahweh, deliver me. Please. I don’t know how. I don’t know what’s next. But I am here. Let your work come to pass. It cannot return to you void.
Thank you for your word. For your prayers for me. Thank you for being the only God. The God that cares for us. For me. Nothing is too hard for you. You are strong and mighty and you will deliver. Yahweh, I know that your glory is also displayed at our lowest moments. Our darkest days, but that cannot be the only time that you are displayed. Your glory must shine forth in every season and it feels like I’ve been down for so long. I can’t help myself, much less help others. I can’t do any of this in my own strength.
Yahweh. I will learn what you desire me to learn. I will walk where you require me to. And I surrender any thought that is not of you. Any dream that is not of your plan. I know that you placed certain things on my heart and I will trust you to fulfil. But where what is not of you have corrupted, strip it from me. Show me what I ought to do so that what I am to do in your name will succeed.
Thank you for living for me.
Thank you for saving us.
Yahweh, I pray for Miya. Help her to stay focused on you. To trust you, to do what you have called her to do. Remember the business, the one that you have called. Help it to prosper and to grow. To be the ministry that you desire it to be. Thank you for your grace and your love. I love you.