March 9, 2022
Wow. Half the week is pretty much going already! Can you believe it?! I can. Thank you for another day and yep – would definitely prefer not to have a repeat of yesterday so I am up. Thank you for life, health and strength. The headache is mostly going so yayyyy!
My mind is quiet this morning. Thank you for your love that you’ve shown a million and one ways. Yesterday a letter was received accusing our Department of victimisation and honestly, it’s natural to go on a defensive, because like what?!! When??? How?!!! What?!!! Especially since I am usually the one who deals with this area and the people haven’t crossed my desk or anything in years. So how are they being victimised? It was truly puzzling. And honestly I was ready to defend myself, but (thank you for you), but you reminded me that you are my champion. And yes I may have to respond, but my way of responding has to be from a different place. From a place of assurance that you will fight, not me and that I just have to do what you have called me to do.
Thank you Yahweh for reminding me. Lol. Though not that funny, I am trying to always remember, even though it’s not possible to remember everything, but I can at least remember to pause. I may not know how to respond in every situation, but I know how to stop before responding: to allow you to guide and for that I am thankful. I will continue to stop and to keep trusting you to lead.
Yahweh, I pray for understanding to know how to respond to any situation with grace. I find myself getting quieter and quieter at home, or maybe home is just getting louder and I find myself looking for quiet. And not always finding it physically, but I am thankful for the peace I find in you. And time spent with you. In your promises.
Sigh. Even though I felt off-kilter yesterday when I got up so late, it really highlighted how much I need my own space. To determine how I move. Honestly, Yahweh, I am not a morning person and when I get up things like the radio, loud talking just makes me want to cringe and disappear. But I can’t. I asked for endurance to do what is required of me. To honour you know in all that I and to honour my parents also. To move forward in the promises that you’ve given even without all the pieces. This weekend though, I am going camping. Not even sure where. But I need to separate.
Isaiah 41:12, 13 – You will search for your enemies, but you will not find them. Those who are at war with you will be reduced to nothing and no longer exist. I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand and say to you, “Don’t be afraid; I will help you.”
The truth is: I don’t like conflict. My usual is to seek a peaceful resolution. However I’ve come to realise that while I may prefer peace, there are those who prefer war. It’s interesting that it says those who are at war with you, not you/me with them. They are the ones warring. Most times, there is no justification for this type of war and honestly to find them and fight them is a waste of energy. And when we join that battle we become like them and not like Yahweh.
But there’s a visual that I’m getting, it’s not the first time, but it was in a different context. Yahweh will uphold us with his righteous right hand but he will also hold our right hand. In essence God’s got our back. When someone is holding hands side by side, It’s usually their left hand and your right hand or vice versa. But it’s not that easy to hold right hand to right hand when standing side by side. Now, nothing is too hard for Yahweh, but work with me here. It’s not a natural position to hold someone’s right hand with your right hand unless they are in front of you or behind you. If Yahweh is holding your right hand from in front with his right hand (almost like a handshake LOL), guess what you cannot see? Those who are fighting you. All you would see is Yahweh. If he is holding your right hand from behind, it is a position of support, prevents falls and prevents any unseen weapons from hitting (we can’t see behind us anyway). Whichever side he holds us from he has us covered.
Exodus 14:14 – The Lord is fighting for you! So be still!
But I love the King James version.
The Lord shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace.
The word used (translated) to fight means “devour” with further definition of “to fight, do battle.” But it goes even a little further to say “order the battle.” Yahweh is fighting for us. But even in this context, it’s not a battle Israelites went searching for. The Egyptians came against them and I think that’s important to note. But there are times, Yahweh calls for us to take the offensive and he goes before us in those battles. Those are the battles we have to fight with him leading the way. But the ones where you’re minding your business and they decide to wage war? Those he asks for us to stand still.
The root word used here is “charash” which means to engrave, cut in, plough, be deaf, be silent. Like what now?! How can one word mean all of this?! But looking at it – I think of enduring trials – where enduring is a stand your ground and also to remain under. The battle I did not go looking for is a trial that I need to stand firm in. Honestly, I’m seeing where I dig my feet into the ground – I cut into the ground and anchor myself. Stand still. Be silent. Because Yahweh is there. And who knows, by talking we draw more attention to ourselves and it takes us out of the refuge that was forged for us in the middle of the battle.
Yeah I pray for the wisdom to know when I am called to fight and when others are at work with me (well you). Thank You For fighting for me, and how do you do so many things at once?! You are truly God. There is none like you. Even the stories that people make up about “gods” can’t even come close to the reality of you. Thank you for being who you see you are. You are indeed my champion.
Champion: Someone who surpasses all rivals. Someone who vigorously supports or defends a person.
That’s you and all counts. Thank you.
God of Angel Armies by Chris Tomlin
I am a firm believer in not envying anything that someone has/has accomplished. Why? I’ve often said that to get what they got, are you prepared to go through what they went through? Yahweh knows what it takes to bring out what is needed from each person and also knows how the experiences can be used for their good (even when it’s heartbreaking in the moment).
But so often we look at someone and wish to have their money, fame or whatever. But… they may have also been abused or homeless or lived through a war. Survived disease. Can we go through the same thing? So for me, I will not envy someone’s blessings but I will be thankful that they made it through whatever they went through to receive the reward.
At this moment, I feel so drained. I just want to close my eyes and sleep. Email still not working so called the help desk, hopefully when the technician comes in it could get sorted.
Lol. That moment when you realise that you are truly okay with someone making you their enemy. You didn’t choose it. You operate on what is true, but they aren’t in agreement and so they try to tarnish your reputation. But I will stand still, dig deep and be quiet. It’s not my battle to fight.
