First Day Jitters

April 29, 2022

It’s today! The first day of the prayer group meeting! I have never done anything like this before. Yahweh I pray for your guidance and your grace. Where two or three: I pray that we would be a support, would not be afraid to come before you. That we would see this time as an avenue to walk even closer to you. Thank you for each of these young ladies. Yes, I am saying young since they’re all younger than me (and truthfully I only just realized that). I pray that as we meet we will take any limitations that we have placed on you and ourselves off. That we would be who you desire us to be. That we don’t look at this as just a meetup, but as a springboard to a deeper relationship with you. That you would turn our face to you and learn from you.

Yahweh, I lift each one up individually. Vinny, Angie, Thea, Steph and myself. We are all different and I pray that in our differences we would not be divided. Any spirit that seeks to divide would be conquered in your name. Anything that is not of you would be removed. Cleanse us Yahweh, of every desire that did not come from you. That will not serve as an avenue for your glory, cleanse us Father. You are our father and we your daughters. We are your daughters. 

Thank you for using us. Thank you for your favour. Thank you for your revelation. We are yours. Thank you for leading. I will follow. I pray that we all do and that we go in strength in you. Reflect your love and grace. Develop in your character. And keep each other close and you closer. Thank you.

Jeremiah 2:13 – My people have done two things wrong. They have abandoned me, the fountain of life-giving water. They have also dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that can’t hold water.

It’s amazing that all we do wrong falls into one of two categories. We have abandoned you and we worship other gods. It’s so deceptively simple. But your paradox still remains because even its simplicity covers a multitude of wrongs. But it also shows that a list of rules to follow is not what you desire. You desire that we love you because all else flows from that. When we love, we follow. When we love you, we honour you. 

Jeremiah 2:2 – Go and announce to Jerusalem, ‘This is what the Lord says: I remember the unfailing loyalty of your youth, the love you had for me as a bride. I remember how you followed me into the desert, into a land that couldn’t be farmed.

That’s what love does and what you are asking of us still. To love you and to follow you. To trust you as you lead us to through the desert to a land that is set apart – the best part of the harvest. But we also stubborn: we keep getting away from you and trying to dig our own wells for water when you are offering us water in this dry land. Digging a well in the desert is pretty much impossible. I don’t know why we do it, when you have proven time and time again that you are the fountain of Living water. We don’t need to store up anything – Your Love, your water is always flowing. (Living Water).

You offer it to us freely. I don’t know what to say other than forgive us Yahweh. Wash us and restore us to you. Help us turn our hearts to you and to not harden our hearts like the walls of a broken cistern: it’s dry and useless. Any earthly god that we have placed as our god, reveal it and show us how to step away and step back to you. Nowadays, our gods aren’t necessarily made of wood or stone, but of metal, glass and ether. Like you, we can’t see ether and so often we want to assign the properties of you to it. But You are God alone no matter what anything or anyone else may want to claim. You are God alone and it is in you we live and breathe. No matter how much we try, we can’t breathe the internet and what’s on it. No matter what we do, once we place it over our lives, we will suffocate because it’s not you and it cannot sustain us. 

Help us to set you back to the rightful place in our lives. We are guilty of the charges that you have bought before us. Yahweh, this nation. We bow before you. Cleanse us in your living waters. Not the waters of Egypt or Assyria, but of you. You are living, you are life itself and we surrender to you. Cover us in your righteousness because no matter how much we try to clean ourselves it won’t work. You are our healer. Heal us father. You are the restorer. I know we are hard-headed, yet in our foolishness we have cracked our heads. Yahweh, soften our hearts and minds to honour you. To do what you are calling us to do in truth. To follow you and to remember the love we had and to return to it. Accept us as your servants, Yahweh. Your children, you are the one true God.

Thank you for who You are. For being true when we aren’t and showing an example for us. Thank you for forgiving us and restoring the lines between us that they fall in pleasant places. Help us to live each day in you. To rejoice in your love. You are my God and King. I love you.

Test or Temptation?

Is this a test or temptation? Leaving home this morning, Mom hands me a container with food that the nephew has cooked. I’m really trying not to mention that I’m in a season of praying and fasting. I took the container, said Thank you and put it in my miniscule fridge and exited the house because Mom was also cooking dinner. 

Fast forward to the office. The guys are having a cookout at work. The kitchen is right next to my office and these guys can cook. I don’t know whether it’s a test or temptation but for this entire month food just keeps passing at times when I’m fasting! Even at church! Somebody decided to bring juice for everyone last week. I ducked out quickly but it was literally brought to my vehicle. The juice is still in my fridge (straight face).