February 11, 2023
3:23am : in my bed
Yahweh. Thank you. You are most beautiful. You are beyond compare. You are the only wise God. Thank you for not allowing me to sink into despair. For loving me.
Confession: I am monumentally tired. But I also desire to go to church. Because I do want to worship you in community. I am thankful that you use me. That you saw a purpose in me and desire to fulfil it. And so many times we don’t always “see” the effect of what we do, but the moments that you decide to pull back the veil a teeny bit and it is almost unbelievable what you do to protect your children. Thank you for your love and care over us.
I do pray that next week I am able to exercise more. The days were so unusual that for two of the days exercise did not factor into it seriously. Thank you for enabling me to start back to lose the weight I had put back on. It is so ridiculously easy for me to put on weight that I can’t afford to slip. But even if I do (I’m really not trying to), I am thankful for your grace.
Forgive me for my thoughts that are not of you. The actions that may not have represented you. Cleanse your church and draw us closer to you. Not to a building but to you. Yahweh, I pray for Gen. That she will find her strength in you. That she will choose you at all times as her Lord and Saviour. I pray that she will hold on to you and that she will be blessed in her coming and going. Touch her Yahweh and fill her to overflow. Thank you for using her. For gifting her. Hold her close. This is my prayer in the matchless name of Jesus. Amen.
Psalm 139:10 – even there your hand would guide me and your right hand would hold on to me.
Even there: even in the most unexpected places. Even in the times when the world seems rough. Even when I make stupid choices. Even though I may feel sad. Even there you are with me. Thank you for being there and here. Your hand would guide me.
Guide: Nachah : to lead, go in direction of, guidance in prosperity and righteousness, treating kindly, bestow, govern.
But this one I absolutely love. Don’t get me wrong. I love “guide,” that you would guide us. But the right hand will hold. First up, your right hand is mighty, victorious. Your right hand is Jesus. Then your victorious right hand is holding us.
Hold : Achaz : to grasp, take hold, take possession, to fasten.
It’s not a light hold that we can accidentally slip through your fingers. You’ve claimed us, fastened us to you. We belong to you. I am yours. You are not letting go and I am beyond thankful for that. Thank you for taking possession of us and never letting go.
10:52am : in church
Honestly I hate it. I try not to, but I hate it. So this man up there promoting his play and he’s eventually saying if you’re a single woman, you shouldn’t be going about desiring marriage because you may end up in a bad marriage. It bothers me. Of course the man saying this is married. What are we always treated so? It bothers me. I try not to let it bother me, but I must confess I walked out.
Jesus, you are my cornerstone.
You are my strength when I’m alone.
You’re the forgiver when I’m wrong.
Jesus you are.
You are the peace within my song.
You are the shelter from all harm.
I love it when you hold me in your arms.
Everything I need, you.